Follow your Bliss--Thanks Mary Lou!

As Connor approaches the end of his masters degree, the question looms, "What Next?" From a realistic, pragmatic position, he should continue his studies in the Ottawa area, either at Carleton, University of Ottawa, or St Paul's University, depending on the field of his choice for his PhD studies. The problem with practicality and realistic thinking is that is rarely the stuff that dreams are made of. In a perfect world, that was universally accessible with equity and accessibility for all, Connor's grade point average and educational background would guarantee him acceptance in any ivy league university of his choice. Indeed, from the time he was 7 years old he said he was going to Harvard Law school when he graduated from university.
Then, reality rears its ugly head. Harvard is 8 hours away by car, in the Boston Massasschutes, costs 45,000 per year just for tuition, and does not include 24 hour attendant care. In addition to requiring physical care for his daily routine, the educational and research rigors of a PhD program will excited an almost full time research assistant. Don't get me wrong, I have always know that this was the next step, but somehow it crept up on me without a sound.
So the problem with dreams is that reality usually bites them in the ass.
Connor could get into Harvard (or any other school he chose) we could move to Boston and work on his Phd but realistically (theres that bite!) would that be the best use of our resources. He (and virtually everyone around us) is told over and over again not to give up on your dreams. but, dreams by definition, are  fleeting, ghostly things that do not exist in the realm of reality. In addition, those who advise Connor not to give up on his dreams do not live in his reality; nor do they have a concept of how much work: both physical and emotional goes into his daily grind, let alone adding the stress of moving to another country with who knows what services in place.
When I asked Connor what his dream was he answered, "to be employed." I consider that a goal and a given truth at that. After further contemplation, he added that it was to teach at the College of Humanities at Carleton. Now, we are getting somewhere|!
Still there was a certain amount of whimsy when he added, after digging deeper, "To study at the American School in Athens." Now thats a dream! Forget about another country, this kid wants a whole other continent. Harvard would be a cake walk compared to Athens. At least the USA speaks English!
So back to reality with its achievable, measurable goals with dreams tucked away for another day.
He will more than likely study at U of T, Ottawa U, Queens, or Western, where I can divide my time between him, Max, Jarrett, my dogs and my job.
Yet, that pesky little dream idea weighs heavily on my mind and as is the usual case in my life the universe opened up and taught me a lesson about dreams and their evolution. this weekend we attended a CD launch of a dear friend of ours, Mary Lou Minor. Now, everybody and their dogs has a CD these days but most of the time it has been burned on someones laptop and recorded in the basement. but Mary Lou is going to be selling hers on itunes and in HMV stores! this was the real Mcoy! the catch is that  Mary Lou is my age. Once she told me that she had written songs early in her youth with but the traditional life of mother, wife and work it fell by the wayside. A few years ago she started up again; this band was the second incarnation. So here, 5 years later, with the love and support of her husband Rob and her family and friends, there she was on stage bringing her dream to fruition. As I watched her playing her large guitar, dancing and singing out her original songs, sung with her sultry voice, I realised that dreams do not die, they just hibernate for awhile, long enough for the season and the world to be in the right place.
So maybe Connor wont go to Harvard or the American School or Oxford for his Phd. Indeed, at this point it would be a miracle if he did. but that doesn't mean that he never will: Harvard is not going anywhere and neither are his dreams.

All I know is that Connor is going places and there is absolutely no way of stopping him or even slowing him down and I have no doubt no matter how unrealistic his dreams are, he will bring them all to fruition. He has never given up and I doubt he ever will.